Nigerian Christians have been told to make Family teachings a major aspect of the Church Ministry. This was part of the message delivered by a renowned theologian and bible scholar, Rev. Dr. S.M. O. Oni, at a special Family Seminar held by the Christ Ambassadors Band of Preach The Word Evangelistic Team Inc to commemorate the annual Easter Programme Seminar of the church for Christian Home.
Dr. Oni who is also a university lecturer, speaking on Handling Distress In Marriage and Attributes to Having a Happy and Successful Home commended the Church for hosting a family seminar on the subject matter in a time like this.
He called on Pastors and Church leaders to teach their members on how to handle various crises in different homes saying it was because of the stress in different homes that have led to more crises in the country and other parts of the world.
He said, “Our Pastors must be getting involved in family matters, and whatever we can do to help the people going through family stress should be done. The Church is established to uphold families, and not to promote individuals. We must know how to manage external forces in marriage.”
In his presentation, the erudite scholar and trainer defined stress as a means of unpleasant feelings and a structure that does not stand well in any family setting. He likened a distress marriage to a distressed building that is in a very poor condition.
He attributed distress in marriage to a number of factors among which are damage from physical distress, mutual neglect by the elements involved, the husband, wife and the children, age related issues, wear and tear in marriage, foundational problems, spiritual attacks and environmental problems, pointing out some factors leading to stress in marriage.
These he identified as anger, lack of sexual fulfillment, job issues, battering and mutual assaults, infertility and childlessness, medical challenges, financial recklessness and external pressures.
He also offered different ways of handling stressful situation in the family. These he listed as prayers, patience, maturity, humility, love, proper counsel, self-control, pastoral involvement and legal options.
Concluding giving example of Samson in Judges 14, the guest lecturer called for parental counsel, personal conviction, divine agenda, handling marital issues with maturity, and the urge to build on Jesus Christ as the Solid Rock, and the need to beware of intruders in marriage.
He also called on parents and church leaders not to support misplacement of African cultural values in marriage, as he condemned the practice where couples of modern day keep themselves in hotels and secluded places before and after their wedding.
“The normal African practice is for the parents to pray for their children before they go into marriage and pray to welcome them back home after the marriage, but today, such our valuable tradition has been thrown to the winds. It has been substituted by the bride and the groom lodging themselves in hotels and secret places outside the views of their parents.”
In her own contribution, Evang. Foluke Awoleye, a popular gospel music minister harped on discipline in the family, as she called on parents to instill discipline in their children, while the children should also abide by the instructions given to them by their parents, noting the impact of disciplinary measures enforced by their spiritual father, brother and mentor, Archbishop Lawrence Ayodele Afilaka who was also physically present at the seminar with his amiable wife, Mama Olufunmilayo Afilaka.
In her remarks the convener of the seminar, Rev. Mrs. Bola Adereti called on the participants to make the best use of the seminar. She said most of the things discussed at the seminar were all what they needed to know in having a happy home. She called on the participants to reflect on the various teachings and prayers offered at the programme.
All the teachings and prayers are biblical and we must make sure that we make the best use of them. All the teachings are done in the fear of the Lord and we must make use of the lessons learnt with various examples and case studies we had in the sessions.
Present at the seminar were various ministers of God, male and female from within and outside the Church. The list included Bishop Isaiah Adegunju Adereti, Bishop Matthew Haruna, Rev. Joseph Haruna, Pastor and Mrs. Jesuloba, Prophet Ishola Aminu, and a host of others.
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